Video Gaming an Addiction?

I always tend to read the news on Yahoo and CNN when I'm up late at night and as of lately, I've been seeing this articles of the possibly of "calling excessive video-game playing a formal psychiatric addiction." I'm not exactly sure what to think of this. I realize that today's children, teenagers, and young adults stay in doors more and use the TV, computer and video games as their form of entertainment rather than going out in the yard and playing tag or I don't know working in the yard if you're an old teen/young adult. However, to put video gaming into the same category or at least compare it to alcoholism is kind of extreme in my opinion.

A lot of young people, college students and even some older people have been playing the online video game World of Warcraft since it's release back in 2004. I mention WoW as the game of choice, because it seems that any time an article about excessive game playing comes up WoW is mentioned, anyways... I, like most of the people have played, have put off school, friends, family, being outside to play the game instead; I have been holed up in my room for many hours just sitting at the computer playing. Does this mean I was addicted? My mom would say yes. My family would say yes. I would say yes to a degree because I always have/had the choice to stop...I wasn't playing the game because it was something that I absolutely NEEDED (not like an alcoholic NEEDS his beer), I played because I was bored, I had nothing else to do: what is so wrong with playing a video game (whether it be for 10 minutes or hours) after going to classes all day (college student) and/or going to work a PT job afterwards?

Everyone has their own personal reasons for playing WoW, as they do for playing other video games. If you're a younger child, then the parents need to take more responsibility and turn the damn TV off when they think enough is enough. Encourage them to go outside instead or just take the games away completely. As for those of us that are older and enjoy gaming, it really isn't as extreme as these articles are making it out to be and I wish they'd stop. Like I said, a lot of us do it because we're bored or after a long day of classes/work it's OUR way to relax and chill out...you just have to make the decision for yourself when to stop.

No more pain

My mouth feels better today, as it did yesterday. I think the swelling from where they gave me shots to numb my mouth was what was causing my tooth (even after the sealant was redone) to feel very odd. Every time I bite down now, it still feels kind of odd but I think it's only because I'm use to the way it was before.

I am hoping it'll be nice today...I want to swim.

Sore Mouth!

I went to the dentist this morning at 8:15 to get a tooth looked at because I knew I had a cavity in it; it was the very last tooth on the bottom left of my mouth...a molar? And I assume the sealant was old and finally a cavity was able to form. Either way, the dentist fixed it all up but now my mouth is sore at the spot that he gave me a shot to numb my mouth...sigh, I hate the dentist. Also, because of the new sealant he put on the tooth when I bit down everything feels weird because I have been use to how the tooth was before. BAH!

Fall '07 Schedule

I have a general idea of what I may possibly do about my schedule for this coming semester. I am in need of 5 classes; 1 math, 1 science, 2 humanities/social sciences, 1 elective...and if all goes well this semester and I pass everything, I should be on my way to graduating with my Associate of Arts degree when classes end in December of this year. However, when looking up the classes I had already decided I wanted to take yesterday (since registeration opened then) I ran into some issues. First of all, this is the FIRST semester I've had such difficuilty in finding classes that 1) don't meet at the same time as another class, 2) only have one class meeting scheduled, and 3) don't meet in the evening. So far, all the classes I've wanted to take either meet at the same time another one, only has one class meeting so if I really want to take the class I have to take it at that time even if I may not want too, or they are scheduled as evening classes.

I had planned on taking: Marriage & Family (only has one class meeting), Biology 102 (only because I took 101 last semester, but the class meeting I want starts at the same time as Marriage & Family, unless I take it in the evening), Juvenile Deliquency (only one class meeting and it's in the evening), Alcohol & Drug Abuse (only one class meeting and it starts when Juv. Deliquency does) and Probability & Statistics (unless I get my placement test done & can get into college algebra). So, as you can see I have a lot of classes overlapping each other as far as time goes, and the thing that makes it even more difficult is that when you take a science class you have a 3 hour lab that goes with it that meet once a week on a certain day, so you can't have the lab meeting on Wednesday at 1:30pm-4:30pm if you have a class Mon, Wed, Fri from 1:30pm - Xpm...see what I'm saying?

So I went back and I started searching to see what classes I could replace with what and what times I could take classes without overlapping with another and I think I got it figured out; I had to replace Biology with a different science class which is no big deal, and I replaced Alcohol & Drug Abuse with an online sociology class which is no big deal and this is what I came up with:

Monday, Wednesday, Friday
- Marriage & Family; 10:20a - 11:15a
- Solar System Astronomy; 11:30a - 12:25a
- Lab: Wed or Fri; 2p - 5:15p (haven't decided which day I want to take lab on, it's only 1 day a week)
- Probability & Statistics; 12:40p - 1:35p

Tuesday, Thursday
- Juvenile Deliquency; 6p - 7:21p

Online
- Social Problems

This is just an idea; I know for sure I am taking Marriage & Family and Social Problems but as for the rest I haven't decided if I am going to keep them at those times or what have you. I may also take out Juvenile Deliquency and replace it with another online class (Intro. to Criminal Law) that way I only have classes on MWF and I can have Tues/Thurs off to work or something. :)

Day of Mourning

Never forget "The Brave Charleston Nine!"

Nine Firefighters Dead: Biggest Lost since 9/11.

Monday night around 7 PM, the Sofa Super Store located on Savannah Highway (HWY 17) in Charleston, SC caught fire due to a fire that started in a trash bin behind the store. Firefighters rushed inside the massively large store which was not equipped with sprinklers to make sure no employees were trapped inside; the fire hadn't even reached the building. However, within a matter of minutes after these firefighters rushed inside the building, a massive fireball blew through the building as the fire managed to bust down a door. It wasn't long before the roof of the building collapsed, trapping the nine men inside the building with no way of escape. All nine died. This is the biggest lost of firefighters since 9/11 and quickly became national headline news (CNN, NBC, Statements issued by the White House from President Bush).

The Sofa Super Store is located 5 minutes from my grand parents house and I was at their house the night this fire took place. Although, we didn't realize it until my cousin called asking if we were burning furinture did we hear about the fire. They closed down all of HWY 17, and it wasn't until the next morning that Charleston found out it had lost 9 firefighters in the fire; they were just doing their job. It's a very tragic story because these men were fathers, sons, brothers and husbands; they lead lives aside from the fire department and held different jobs ranging from barber to coach. And while the actual event is nothing compared to 9/11, the lost of nine firefighters gives the same feeling through out the city; mourning, saddness and pain. My heart goes out to the families that lost loved ones and makes me cherish mine even more to know that they are still okay and in the world...I have an uncle who was a firefighter for many years.

You can see all news coverage here: http://www.charleston.net/

Cleaning Day!

Since it seems that every time I want to go swimming the weather decides to be cloudy and/or rain, I have decided to spend the day cleaning! If you asked anyone around me if I was a messy, unorganized person they would probably tell you yes, but I beg to differ. It's just that when I clean I do it all at once, just as when I wash clothes; unless I have absolutely nothing to wear. Clothes sit in piles until I'm ready to wash them, and being that I stay in my room most of the time I do have empty water bottles all over my desk but all I have to do is throw them into the trash when I'm done. I know where things are and can locate them fairly fast, so what's the big deal? =P I guess it's different when you're at someone else's house because when I'm staying with the boyfriend, I can't stand it when he leaves old dirty clothes/boxers lying around the bathroom, yet I leave mine in my own bathroom, haha. Either way, I'm off to clean, move a bookshelf into my room and probably head out later for some lunch!

I hate the dentist!!

The last few weeks my teeth have been bothering me; it's been quite some time since I had my teeth cleaned at the dentist and it's not something I do on a regular basis even though I should as well as EVERYONE else. I know for a fact that I have a cavity or two on the back molar on the left side of my mouth, I think the sealant that was put on it finally gave way and now this. It's starting to hurt/bug me, so I made an appointment for the dentist on Monday.

My dad also refuses to fax my mom and the VA office the needed document so that I can get my ID renewed. Because he's in the military, I get my insurance through him but when I turned 21 they cut it off until I could show that I was a full time student (b/c when you turn 21, you aren't covered anymore unless you're a full time student). I have all the needed papers I need to show them at the VA office that I'm in school but my dad has refused for MONTHS to fax the other document that only HE can provide to us. So now, we're stuck paying $80+ for fillings (that we don't really have) that I have to get fixed because my tooth hurts and I have a prescription that I get filled every month that I also NEED that runs about $56 (with insurance it's only $9 that I pay), and yet he still won't send us the form. It's that simple, send us the form and we'll quit bugging you!!!

Braves game possibly?

Yesterday while at my grandmother's house, she started watching the Braves vs. Red Sox game on TV and mentioned that she'd really like to go to another live game. She asked my mom and I if we'd like to go, if they actually went again. Of course, I said yes...I'm not a big fan of sports or even watching sports but it's a totally different atmosphere when you're watching a live game opposed to on TV.

I started looking up tickets at the Braves website, and she said she'd like to see them play the Mets which is on August 31st. I am really hoping that she decides to go and buy tickets because on August 30th, Albert will be flying in and if that's the case he'll be going with us to a Braves game. He isn't a big sports person either expect to watch UFC on TV, but he said he'd love to go. :) We shall see!!

O'Donnell to replace Barker?

Bob Barker endorsed his friend Rosie O'Donnell as a possible successor on "The
Price Is Right," although the newly retired host isn't sure CBS wants a woman to
take over the game show.
"I believe they're going to have a meeting with
Rosie," Barker said backstage Friday night at the Daytime Emmy Awards, where he
won his 19th trophy.
"She knows the show," he said. "There's no doubt in my
mind she could do the show. Now, whether they want a lady host, I don't know.
I've never heard that discussed. As far as I know, they've only auditioned
men."
Barker said his friendship with O'Donnell goes back several years, when
she had him as a guest on her old daytime talk show.
"She told me she loved
`The Price Is Right' and wanted to host it one day," he recalled.
Among those
mentioned as possible replacement hosts have been Todd Newton of the E! network,
Mark Steines of "Entertainment Tonight," George Hamilton and John
O'Hurley.
Barker retired last week at age 83 after 35 years of giving away
vacations and cars on the hit CBS game show. But he said he may be back with
some specials featuring vintage clips and guests.
"If it works out, I'd like
to do that," he said. Source

All I have to say is this: if they make Rosie the new host of the Price Is Right the show is done for. I absolutely hate the woman, and anything that she has ever touched has been ruined; just look at The View...granted, ratings may have been up for some time but look at the rude, snide comments she made and the people she pissed off. It's one thing to be opininated and not have a problem sharing your views, comments and thoughts with the world and those around you but it's a completely different ball game when you're just flat out ignorant with the comments you make. Much like the comment Rosie made on The View a few weeks back calling U.S. troops the real terroists in Iraq. Stupid people, I tell you.

Time to say GOODBYE!

World of Warcraft was released in November of 2004; I had played part of the beta because the guy I was dating at the time had access to it. I figured since he was so into gaming, if I liked this game I would buy it and we could play together giving us something else to do and another different way to 'spend' time together. I got the game when it was released in 2004 and have played it religiously for the past 2.5 years (almost 3!!). Today is the day that I cancel my account for the last time never to reactivate it again; I have cancelled it twice in the past 2 months only to be convinced by some gaming friends to reactivate it...NOT THIS TIME!!!

It sounds really cheesy when you think of someone spending all their hours of the day locked away in their bedroom (or where ever your PC is located), pounding mercilessly at the keyboard, with a headset with mic attached glued to your head at all times. But the reality of the matter is this: gaming addiction is no different than any other addiction and is just as hard to break. Do I think I sound weird when I say that I had a gaming addiction to WoW? Of course I do, but the reality was that I did...and I had for the 2.5 years, although the time spent in the game had been drastically reduced at the beginning of 2007. I, like most WoW players, spent all my free time on the PC, raiding "hardcore" until 3-4am sometimes (beginning around 7-8pm EST). I put off spending time with my family (don't really have any friends to put off, and no that wasn't a result of the game) and decided to skip out on many activities, along with failing out of my first semester of college because I felt obligated to be there for a raid and not to let my guild down.

Cheesy, stupid, dumb, illogical I know what it sounds like especially if you've never played a video game as such but the truth is there are millions of players who are in the exact situation I was. I cannot hate the game completely because I met some amazing online friends via the game along with my current boyfriend, so for that I am thankful. However, after 2.5 years of gaming continuously only to lose interest in it in the last couple of months per drama filled environment and the release of The Burning Cursade expansion it is time to hang up my hat and never look back. :)

Ugh...

I don't know why I always agree to go out to eat when the resturant of choice is Ryan's. I've only eaten there two times this entire year and both times I've gone I've always felt like I was going to get sick afterwards; so far I have yet to actually GET sick though, but my stomach always feel so queesy.

Today was really gloomy. It rained and rained some more. I had to make a trip to the bank to deposit the ONLY $30 I had left so that the $10 gas charge and the $10 insta mail charge that I did this past week would not make my account go negative because I had a balance of $0 after my gas charge. Yay for being poor. On the way to the bank, it decided to down pour on me which was not a good thing because my car is currently without a working A/C (blows air, just doesn't cool) thus my windows fogged and I seriously thought I was going to get in an accident, thank god I didn't. I just want it to stop raining and be sunny and warm so I can swim, dang it. I need to finish working on my tan haha!

Bad Days = Lame!

Yesterday was probably one of the lowest/worst days I've had in awhile; there is nothing like receiving a 20 page hand written letter from your ex-boyfriend (whom you dated for 2 years back when you were 15/16 years old...I'm 21 and he's 22 now) who is locked away in prison for 13 years (has 8 years left) for a stupid decision that he made, basically telling me that I am an asshole and made him feel like a worthless piece of trash because I asked him in a letter all the questions I had been wanting to ask for the last three years about he, we got from Point A to Point B (which is him being locked up).

You see...I lived in Kansas for about 5 years, and I was forced to move away after the end of my ninth grade year to South Carolina to be with my mom. My mom had left KS a few months prior to me being sent to live with her and because of the situation with my stepmom and I, my dad basically kicked me out. Barry (my ex) and I dated for a year long distance and then we decided to remain friends, and friends we have been. I had planned on moving back to Kansas after I graduated from high school because well...after 5 years of living in Kansas it had become home and I loved it there, not to mention I wanted to be with him. The same month that I graduated high school was the same month he got busted with all the lame stuff and got arrested; how was I suppose to move back at that point when he was going to be the sole provider for the time being? It just didn't feel right to me and so I never went back, and now he holds against me saying that I never planned on coming back.

He doesn't understand that I only asked the questions; questions about how he met certain people that got him in trouble, what other drugs besides pot he was invovled with, why he made the decision to beat the crap out of the boy; was because I wanted to better understand why we were at the point we were at now, and for three years I had been trying to figure out the answers and no one (not even his mom) would give me straight answers. But because I asked about all the 'bad' stuff from the past, I made him feel like crap because I made him dig up the things that he has thought about for the past 3 years, and look at the decisions he has made that has messed up his whole life. I never once called him a name, told him to screw off or what have you; if I truly didn't care or thought he was worthless, I wouldn't waste my time by seeing him whenever I get the chance to visit KS (like last month) or even writing. However the part that stuck out the most of the WHOLE letter is this and I quote:

"You see, I realize the difference between your love for me, and the love my mom
has for me. EVEN in prison, if I were to continue to make poor choices that
affect only me, my mom would still love me while some how I get the impression
that you have to write a 5 page letter explaining how I "fucked up your life" so
I guess you can make yourself feel better. Because the bottom line is this, YOU
NEVER PLANNED ON MOVING BACK TO KANSAS! If you had, me comming to prison would not
have effected ANYTHING! But this is where the truth lies, you love is
conditional. Tell me if I'm wrong. If it was unconditional, LCF would not be a
"barrier" like you say it is. I know men who have been locked up 15...20 years
and their wives, the women that profess their love for them mean it. I'm not
saying you don't mean what you say, I said it's conditional.

Basically to sum it all up; I apparently don't love him or care about him enough or at all because I won't/can't just drop the life that I have had to make for myself outside of living in Kansas to move back and be closer to him. That basically, if I moved back that would be the only way to prove that I was there for him 150% and loved him as I say I do. I do love him, I always will and always have...but waiting for someone, at a young age (21), for the next 8 years would be in my opinion cheating myself out of so much. I did not make the decision he did that put him where he is but yet I have made the decision to stick by him as a friend because all he has is his family (mainly only his mom) and because I do care about him but apparently me being there for him is not enough. He doesn't seem to understand and/or realize that I have to do what I feel is right for me and my life at this point, and at this point I don't feel that me moving back to Kansas is the right thing for me.

In the end, I know that I am not perfect and yes I too have put him through some rough times over the last seven years and have made decisions that I am not proud of, but never once did I ever think that he didn't love me through it all and never once did I ever think that he didn't care; since day one of all this happening, I have done nothing but try to be a friend and be a support system in the best way that I knew how being so far away all the while still trying to make decisions that I feel are right in my mind and heart so that I could be okay with my OWN life. Deep down, I do still love him like I did when we first met and that won't ever change, perhaps I am selfish...does it make me selfish because I want something more than just someone stuck behind prison walls that you only get to visit a few times a few and only get a few hugs & kisses at the beginning and end? I don't think it is. I have a lot of decisions to make for myself, decisions that I will have to live with the rest of my life and I'm not about to make a false, irrational move and drop everything that I've worked hard on for the past three years because he feels that my love is conditional.

I love him. I'm there for him but I am not strong enough to be called an asshole and told in a round about way that you don't love me or care about me otherwise you'd come back...and that "answers to the great underlying problem was indeed you and not having you," thus only opening back up my feelings of it was all my fault.

Dashboard Confessional: Stolen

I'm sitting here at 5:40am working on getting Wordpress setup with any errors on my domain and the newest Dashboard Confessional music video for their newest single "Stolen" comes on VH1. I just have to say it's one of my favorites right now along with Gwen Stefani's "4 In The Morning." It's always nice when you can really listen to the lyrics of a song and relate to them.

Stolen by Dashboard Confessional

You watch the season pull up its own stakes
And catch the last weekend of the last week
Before the gold and the glamour have been replaced,
Another sun soaked season fades away
You have stolen my heart
Invitation only grant farewells
Crush the best one, of the best onesClear liquor and cloudy eyed, too early to say goodnight
You have stolen my heart
And from the bar room
floor we are a celebration
One good stretch before our hibernation
Our dreams assured and we are, we'll sleep well
You have stolen
You have stolen my heart
I watch you spin around in the highest heels
You are the best one, of the best ones
We all look like we feel
You have stolen my
You have stolen my
heart

I'm a fish!

enjoy taking baths, what girl doesn't, HONESTLY? Baths with and without bubbles, with and without candles lit; it's relaxing. I take them frequently...yes that means I'm a CLEAN person, but I take a bath even when I don't really need too just to chill out sometimes. I was talking to lover a few weekends ago and I told him about the whirlpool tub that was at the hotel my mom & I stayed the night in while driving home from Kansas a few weeks back; the tub was amazing. I told him that when we got a house, I wanted a whirlpool tub; he kind of laughed at me because they are expensive! :P

Just out of curoisty, I did a search on whirlpool tubs and man...I really can't wait to have one in my house; screw the expense, I'll make up for it promise! I found some pretty interesting bath tubs too, for example this one which allows you to choose colors to fit your mood, haha.

Next Semester: Fall 07!

I'm ready for classes to start...I say this pretty much every time a semester ends and I'm left at home with absolutely nothing to do, and then when the new semester does finally start I attend classes like I should the first couple of weeks and then BAM...if a class bores me (but it's one I need) I attend when I see fit; why do I do this? Why can't I just be like "okay, you know you need to go so go!." This semester (Fall 07), however, I want to do the best that I can as it's my last semester at Tech and before transferring to a 4 year school to start my bachelor's.

I have 5 classes to take this coming semester; two of which I have to take because they are required, math (hopefully will be college algebra) and science (biology 102). The others are pretty much left up to me and are my choice however they either fall under humanities or electives. I'm going to try (if it's offered) and take; Marriage & Family and Juvenile Delinquency which are sociology classes and Alcohol & Drug Abuse. I plan to major in psychology when I transfer off to FGCU, and so the classes that I've been taking since being at Tech aside from the required math, science, english have been nothing but psychology/sociology classes...not to mention I try to take classes on areas that interest me and also have had some effect on my life (such as alcohol & drug abuse...I haven't experienced but just being around people that I care about deeply that have makes me want to take the course).

I don't know when registeration starts though for this coming semester, and quite frankly I'm irritated with the FA office because they failed to inform me that my FAFSA was picked for verification; I have until July 13th (which is no big deal) to bring in copies of taxes forms to be verified...it's like "wow, couldn't you have mentioned this to me when I was actually in the office just last week asking about another question having to do w/ my finicial aid?." Ugh.

Guess Who's Coming!

Did I tell you who is coming to visit me for Labor Day weekend? Granted it's still about 2.5 months away but I'm so very excited as if the day was tomorrow! Anyways...my boyfriend (eeeeeeeee! lol). See, we have a long distance relationship at the moment; he lives in Florida and I live in S. Carolina. We met through World of Warcraft (I know cheesy) and have been friends for over a year. It wasn't until around the end of 2006 that we started talking more and getting to know each other on a more personal level, I went to FL during my Christmas break and we met up and we've been together since. It's hard though with the distance and such, I've only been down to FL twice (since Dec.) to see him since I can't just pick up & leave because of classes, however he's finally coming up here for Labor day weekend to meet my mom. I'm excited :))

Paris Hilton: Out after 3 days then sent back!

I'm sick of hearing about this spoiled brat to be honest with you as I am sure most people are, however what irks me is what has been going on with her as of lately. She was sentenced to a 45 day jail stay because of violating her parole and driving with a suspended liscense. Said sentence was cut down to 23 days because of "good behavior"; how the hell do you receive good behavior days when you hadn't even been to jail yet? It makes no sense. Yesterday, she was released per a medical condition after 3 days. No medical condition is so great that it should warrant early release from any sentence (unless you're dying!).

I could careless about Paris Hilton, but the fact that she was released WAY early from her sentence pissed me off along with milliosn of other people. Maybe it is because I know someone who is personally locked away in jail for a rightful reason for many years and yet her she is, someone with fame and fortune, and actually has to face the fact that she screwed up and gets out of it early because she was going to have a nervous breakdown. Maybe I should get my ex boyfriend (whom is locked up) to yell wolf and claim medical reason after reason as to why he would be better off at home...yeah right that would never happen. It's been stated that any medical condition that she has can be delt with via the prison doctors etc.

And so this morning, Paris Hilton was drug back to the court and told by the same judge that sentenced her that she will finish her jail sentence out in the jail and not at home; after all this judge TOLD her when he sentenced her to being with that she was not allowed to serve her sentence at home with electronic monitoring devices. It's about time someone actually steps up to the plate and does not allow a celebrity use their fame & fortune for their stupid mistakes and actually is making her FACE what she has done. She should be grateful she isn't locked away for years...

First Post: Test!

I have decided to open up the "these-words.org" alternative blog; obviously an alternative blog from my main domain, however all my entries from my domain will be cross posted to here. This will be mainly used for my pay2post postings that way I can eventually keep my domain ad/spam free, all the while still having a place to make money...since you know, us college students are BROKE! :)